Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Sit up straight by Kurt Vonnegut

Ladies and gentlemen of the 1999 incoming
Master's program: Sit up straight.
If I could offer you only one tip for
The future, sitting up straight would
Be it.

Get to know your thesis committee members.
You never know when they're going
To go on sabbatical.

Do not read journal papers. They will
Only make you feel stupid.

Live in Escondido village once, but
Leave before it makes you hard.

Live in Rains once, but leave before
It makes you soft.

Don't waste time forwarding emails.
Sometimes they're funny . Sometimes
They're not. The P.H.D. is long and,
In the end, you probably won't earn as
Much as your friends who didn't go to
Grad School.

You are not as lazy as you think.

Don't worry about publishing. Or
Worry, knowing that worrying is as
Effective as trying to convince your
Advisor he/she may be wrong.

Nap.

Accept certain inalienable truths:
Food is not free. Professors will
Belittle. You too, will grow bitter.
And when you do, you'll fantasize
That when you were a master's student,
Food was free and professors
Listened to you.

Try to date.

Maybe you'll graduate, maybe you
Won't. Maybe you'll contribute to society,
Maybe you won't. Maybe you'll
Be hooded, maybe you'll dropout and get
A life. Whatever you do, don't work
Too hard. Your Thesis topic is half
Made up. So is everybody else's.

But Trust me on sitting up straight.

19 comments:

Vanessa said...

Very inspired!!

Jean Léon said...

I'm sorry to tell you that Kurt Vonnegut just died!!

Anonymous said...

**** Kurt Vonnegut ****

11.11.1922 - 11.04.2007

so it goes ...

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